When we consider signs of trauma’s impact, the first things that come to mind for many of us are large, dramatic symptoms. We’re talking flashbacks, or severe panic attacks, like those often experienced by war veterans. Trauma, particularly the complex kind experienced in childhood, does not always show up in clear-cut form though. Sometimes the repercussions of childhood complex trauma are in plain sight, entwined in our daily lives and behaviors in ways we might not recognize.
We’ll examine five typical indicators of unresolved childhood trauma in this post. These are symptoms that many people go through but might not recognize are related to their past. If any of these sound familiar, remember you’re not alone and that being aware of these patterns is a crucial first step toward recovery.
1. Hypervigilance or Constant Anxiety
A state of constant anxiety, or hypervigilance, is one of the most often occurring but frequently overlooked indicators of childhood trauma. Hypervigilance is that constant feeling of being on-edge, of waiting for anything threatening or dangerous to happen. It’s like having an always-on internal alarm system searching for potential dangers.
Trauma conditions the body and mind to remain on high-alert. It’s the result of growing up in what was perceived, from the child’s perspective, as an unpredictable or unsafe environment. Your nervous system discovered that survival required being constantly on-guard for danger. If you have this kind of anxiety, your body’s likely still in that state today—even in the absence of any immediate threat.
Examples: Perhaps you feel nervous in unfamiliar circumstances without knowing exactly why. Or maybe you find you’re easily startled or upset by unexpected noises. You might find yourself “reading” people’s emotions to determine whether you’re safe, or you’re continuously worrying about worst-case scenarios.
2. Emotional Numbness or Difficulty Identifying Feelings
Emotional numbness—that is, a disconnection from your feelings or emotions—is another frequent indication of unresolved trauma. This can show as not really knowing how you feel in particular circumstances, having trouble naming your feelings, or experiencing a kind of “blankness” within.
Some people develop emotional numbness as a way to cope with trauma. If you had to emotionally distance yourself from emotions to get through tough circumstances as a child, the practice of separating from your emotions could have carried over into adulthood.
Examples: You may find that you feel “detached” during emotional events; your body is there but you are not totally present. Alternatively, even around individuals you love, you may frequently have a nebulous sense of emptiness or flatness.
3. Difficulty Trusting Others or Forming Close Relationships
Trauma that’s unresolved can also affect trust in others—including those you wish to be close to. If your early relationships were marked by betrayal, inconsistency, or even fear, your brain will naturally hang onto a sense of caution or even anxiety surrounding intimacy.
This mistrust is about a deep-rooted sense that being vulnerable could lead to getting hurt; it’s not about not wanting connection. Initially the mind creates walls to protect itself. But these same walls can also restrict us from developing healthy connections with others.
Examples: Even if there is no actual cause to, you may find yourself withdrawing when others get too close or questioning people’s motivations. Alternatively, perhaps you find that you struggle with feeling safe and secure in relationships. You may also find that you’re nervous about being abandoned.
4. Self-Criticism and Persistent Feelings of Guilt or Shame
Another frequent indication of childhood trauma is a severe inner critic. Many people with unresolved trauma have an internal voice that continually points out their “flaws,” causes guilt over little things, or even shames them for just being who they are.
Deep-rooted ideas acquired in childhood—beliefs like “I’m not good enough,” “I don’t deserve love,” or “I’m a burden”—often drive this self-criticism. These shame and guilt feelings can seem so natural that you might not even question them.
Examples: You can feel bad about scheduling time for yourself, constantly second-guess your decisions, or feel as though nothing you do is ever “good enough.” You could experience extreme guilt or fear of judgment even from the smallest of transgressions.
5. Difficulty Setting Boundaries or Standing Up for Yourself
Setting boundaries as an adult can be surprisingly difficult if you suffered trauma as a child. This can be particularly so if it occurred in relationships where you lacked control. Trauma can make it challenging to say “no” or assert your own needs. This leads to a tendency of overextending yourself, people pleasing, or allowing others to take advantage.
Many times, this challenge with boundaries results from a lack of personal autonomy during childhood. Asserting those limits as an adult can seem strange when youngsters grow up lacking control over their own space, decisions, or bodies.
Examples: You might say “yes” to things you don’t really want to do merely to avoid disagreement, or you might feel guilty anytime you express a need or preference. Perhaps you struggle to speak up for or assert yourself even if you know it’s the proper thing to do.
Why Recognizing These Signs Matters
If any of these symptoms speak to you, pause a moment to be kind to yourself. Many people go through these impacts of childhood trauma, usually without realizing their source. Understanding yourself and starting on the path toward healing is more important than assigning blame or obsessing over the past when one recognizes these tendencies in themselves.
Awareness is Powerful
By raising awareness of these indicators, we can begin to make sense of sometimes perplexing or irritating patterns we’ve noticed within ourselves. Knowing where these behaviors originate helps us to investigate ways of beginning the process of healing and transformation.
You’re Not Alone
Many people battle these symptoms of trauma; you don’t have to navigate them alone. There are several paths forward, from reading about trauma recovery to consulting a therapist to just learning self-compassion.
Remember: Healing is a journey rather than a destination. Taking it one step at a time is fine. Just acknowledging these signs is a powerful act of self-care.
Though it can leave lasting effects, childhood trauma can be unlearned. You can also begin to feel more at ease in your own skin. If you recognize within yourself any of these signs, realize that change is within grasp and that one small step at a time can help you heal.